SOS (Rescue Me)

No, seriously - if this isn't the cue to call in the National Guard, raise the terror alert level, or declare a state of emergency, I don't know what is. Britney's done lost it, y'all! For real this time! Forget head-shaving and umbrella-on-car combat. The poor girl has really gone off the deep end, and every blog and news outlet on the planet has the video to prove it. 

The other title for this post I was tossing around was "Ayo for Yayo" but by all accounts, Brit Brit's breakdown has nothing to do with drugs. It looks like my fallen idol's mental state is severely whacked, and it's not the cause of medicinal fun - or at least that's what we're being told. This whole mess started on Thursday night (to be fair, the whole mess started when her and JT wore matching denim outfits to an awards show, but I digress). Brit allegedly held her youngest son hostage, refusing to give both kids over to KFed. Long story short, every fire truck/police car/ambulance was called to the Spears house, and Britney had to be strapped down to a gurney and taken to Cedars Sinai! The latest report is that she was released this morning, and that none other than Dr. Phil came to see her. Phil may feel he can use his nonsensical Texas metaphors to crack the Spears psychosis, but I think her insanity surpasses his abilities at this point. I don't know whether to mourn or pray (if I had any solid religious affiliation, I might know which would be more appropriate), but I can't tear myself away from the blogs. I must be aware of what imminent danger we're all in in case Britney really loses it ("really loses it" has sort of lost all meaning at this point). I'll keep y'all updated. I feel it's my duty.